I had already made progress with my speech when work calls in a small office gave me another hard situation. There were seven people around me. I remember thinking how much that sucked.
I wanted to make the call, and other people could hear it. Being better at speech elsewhere did not make every new setting feel easy.
The feeling of being intimidated was familiar. I could be thinking about what I was going to say, what might go wrong and how small I felt. That attention could grow before the conversation had even begun.
That is why I care about where a call happens. Who is nearby? Who is on it? What is the part that feels difficult?
Don's calls had different conditions
When Don and I talked about his work meetings, I initially asked whether he was in a conference room with his boss. He said he took the calls from his own office with the door shut.
That was useful information. We had talked about music before, so I suggested using a few minutes in that private space to play something that made him feel confident, then moving into the call.
I also suggested joining the virtual meeting early, when there might be a chance for casual conversation before the main business. I wanted him to start using his voice instead of waiting while the question of speaking occupied his mind.
That was the suggestion for his setting. My earlier memory of seven people in a small office was a different experience.
A known format could still feel demanding
The importance of the person also mattered in our discussion. A call could involve a client, a boss or somebody with authority. I described wanting to bring confidence with me and being able to recall a time I had spoken well.
For Don, the closed office gave him an opportunity before the call. Joining early could give him another opportunity as people arrived. Those were concrete parts of the situation he described.
What I wanted to understand about my own speech
I wanted the progress I had made to carry into work and other demanding situations. Some things became easier. Some settings still asked more of me.
I have also explained that my preparation changed over time. I used more of it earlier, then less, and later mainly before the biggest calls. I kept learning what I needed in the setting I was actually facing.
My phone-call account describes more of that work. This office memory adds a particular difficulty: I was speaking to someone on the phone while other people around me could hear.