## Chapter 12. THE INTENTIONAL DREAM ## I Would Picture How I Wanted to Feel When It Was Done For me, when I used to stutter real bad, I pictured these scenes of constant struggle and failure. I bet you do the same. You ain't playing highlights of your best smooth talking moments, right? Nah. But the thing I learned, it took me a long time, it's that we can make a decision to change our self-image. I learned that you can practice in your mind. What does that mean? I mean, you have to practice in real life, of course, and that's important. But a lot of times, or all the times before I do some big speech, I practice a lot in my mind. I'll see it going the best possible that it can go. Intentional Dream is one of my favorite ways to reprogram our subconscious mind. To reprogram our beliefs. It's where you're seeing yourself basically perform like at your best, mixing with this dream a sensation of true happiness. ## Introducing myself to people who had authority inside a big hotel ballroom So for example, instead of constantly thinking about stuttering, my dream looked like this, right? It looked like me being totally confident in introducing myself to people who had authority inside a big hotel ballroom. Because for me that would be a real big challenge, first of all to introduce myself, and second of all to people who have authority in a huge room where you get nervous. So that was my dream. ## When you create this dream, you set the feeling Here's the key. The key is, when you create this dream, it's like how you feel in the dream. That's the whole thing. Because most of the time, like when you're, for me, like to talk to a doctor, or to introduce myself, like I feel like total f*cking panic. Then I'd freeze up, and it'd be embarrassing, and you want to die, and then you fight through it. What I've learned is when you're dreaming it, when you create this dream, you set the feeling. So for me, I was shaking the doctor's hand. What I used is I remembered a feeling, a really happy moment, when I met a sports star. I used that feeling in this dream. So when I was shaking the person's hand, I felt like when I met one of my sports heroes. So I felt incredible. That's such a key part of the dream. ## 5 minutes before I went to bed, and 5 minutes when I woke up So what I did was I literally created this little 5 minute intentional daydream in my head where I saw myself speaking perfectly, which was crazy, because in the real world I was speaking badly. But there's magic there. That's a unique way how I programmed my subconscious mind. It's how I cope, and I just pictured going perfectly. So for 5 minutes before I went to bed, and for 5 minutes when I woke up, but I was in bed before I touched my phone, right? I just lay in bed and I would see it in my mind, like it going perfectly, which like never in my life had I ever done that. ## Let's set this one scene in a courtroom Craig: What's the self doubt coming from? Jovanni: It's mostly with my future in a way. Right now I'm studying for my LSAT. Craig: Do you want to be a lawyer? Jovanni: I do. I really do. Craig: So if I may suggest, let's set this one scene in a courtroom with you, like you talking in commanding presence, right? Like you kicking ass. Jovanni: That's what I picture too. Craig: So I want to learn from you, if I may, what a really good memory is. So we can attach how you feel there to this perfect dream. It's important. So it can be anything. It can be one of the most fun times of your life or a great memory. Jovanni: There was one time I went on vacation with my family and that was really nice. Went to Jamaica and we had a really good bonding time. That was probably one of the best times I remember with my family. We've had so many fun times at home, but I think it was just the whole adventure of it all. Craig: So I want you to think about that. You can close your eyes if you want to, to take yourself back there. You're in Jamaica. Wherever you guys had your meals or were having your fun on the beach or a hotel or just hanging out. How you love that time. Right now, with your eyes still closed, I want you to think you are in the courtroom, the same courtroom maybe that you've been to in Broward. Picture yourself walking in front of the judge. Talking to the jury. Being a badass motherf*cker who is smooth and knows your sh*t, and you're seeing yourself perform at your best. Craig: You got to unplug, you gotta put your phone down and then shift into the dream state that we created of you walking in a courtroom and presenting with total confidence. Do it for five minutes. Just five minutes and then you go to bed. When you wake up before you grab your phone, do the same thing. Before your feet leave the bed. Do the same thing for just five minutes. Jovanni: I appreciate this. I think I'm definitely gonna try to implement it, and I think it would work cause I'm already feeling more at ease just thinking about that dream place. More confident just thinking about it too. I never thought to do that. ## Replay the experience of your speech being killer, and how it felt Right before bed's a magical time to reprogram the subconscious mind. So our beliefs are changeable. Before bed, I want you to replay not the cringiest stuttering moments, which humans naturally do, especially when we're alone in bed very late, can't fall asleep. What I'm teaching you, my friend, is I want you to share one great fluency moment right now with me. What I'm going to teach you is think about that before bed every night for the rest of your life. This is the first time in your life, and it's another key step, that you're intentionally thinking about your fluency, in times when you succeeded, when you did great, when you were the hero, when you were the star, when your speech was amazing. This is intentional. This is a skill. This is on purpose. When you wake up, the same thing. First thought, play the memory. Don't leave bed. 5 minutes. Stay your ass in bed. Set your alarm 5 minutes early if you have to. The point is, the first 5 minutes, 2 minutes minimum, but ideally 5, is replay that moment. Replay the experience of your speech being killer, and how it felt. One of the most important things is how it feels when your speech is great. Magic, my friend. ## You're attracting the feeling you want to have when the call is done So for 30 minutes beforehand, I'm working on how I feel. I'm working on laying down on a floor or a couch or in a chair and really picturing not the call, but I would picture how I wanted to feel when it was done. I hang up, and how do I feel? Well, I want to see myself feeling f*cking excited, and I'm going to go get a cup of coffee, because you just slayed a dragon. This is the mindset that took me from being scared on calls to being able to present with extreme confidence. "So is that like manifesting and putting it out there?" It's in the world of that, but you're not manifesting what you want to see. I want to be very clear. You're attracting the feeling you want to have when the call is done. This is the goal. It's all about how you feel. I swear to God. It's not about what picture you see in your head. It's with how you feel, and I didn't create this, but I did apply it to speech. So jump up, high five yourself, go out and buy a cup, do something to celebrate. It doesn't matter what it is, but it matters that you have something to be excited for when you're done because you did well. That's the magic. Then once I got better, I would only do it for a few minutes, or once I got really good, I wouldn't do it until it was a huge call. But it was part of the routine, and that's important. The routine for good speech. The routine to feel confident. Here's where the magic happens. It's by before that moment knowing it's gonna come, knowing you're going to kill it, not worrying about the words you're gonna say. You can train your mind to beat that. It's all trainable, man. ## Create this intentional dream, and do it for the job interview The thing I now know that I did not know when I was going through it is to use what helped me beat my stutter. Create this intentional dream, and do it for the job interview. So like, what you're essentially doing is you're pre-imagining it. So to me, it's the number one thing. Like this is the sh*t I literally would have craved. Because let me tell you what people who stutter do when they have a job interview coming up. Because I've been there. It's full of f*cking fear. You're imagining the worst, and you're picturing blocks, and you're wondering what are you going to do if you can't say your first name. The way how to have a better one, and like, this is the sh*t I would have told myself if I could have gone back in time, it's that crucial. It's to throw that away. The way you do it is you create a daydream. You create an intentional daydream scenario of you doing this job interview. What does it look like if it goes perfect? The thing about where you are now, and where I was, and where we all are until we fix it, it's we worry about and picture the absolute worst. What I know now is that it will guarantee that it'll go horrible, right? There's no tip I can share to try to say your name smoother. If you're doing those thoughts, it's a guaranteed bad time. The thing that I'm saying is learn how to create an intentional imagination where you're sitting talking to someone, and it wraps up, and they shake your hand, and they tell you like how impressed they are by you, and how they're so excited. Right? Like you can make it up. The dreams that you go to bed with are going to help shape the tomorrow. You don't want to go to bed with the bad dreams anymore, with the bad thoughts.