## Chapter 25. SAY YOUR NAME ## Saying my name was the last thing I beat with my stutter Saying your name at Starbucks, or whenever you purchase food and they ask for a name. Can I have a name, please? Or, what's the name for this order? Or, what name can I put this under? Let's talk about this, because this is big. Saying our own names when we stutter is the number one hardest thing. It's also, for me, the last piece of my speech I got good. That means I got my speech fluent, and saying my name was the last thing I worked on. It was the last thing I worked on because it was the hardest. So for you, reading these words, this idea that your speech can handle saying your name at a Starbucks before you've mastered the techniques of beating your stutter, it's foolish. For me, saying my name was the last thing I beat with my stutter, because it's the one that we have so much emotional deep attachment to. You shouldn't feel like you're having a heart attack just to say your own d*mn name. Been laughed at right to your face because you couldn't say your own name? Well, it can be soul crushing hard. Especially when people see you crumble. The worst question in the world for US is, what's your name? Or, can I get a name for the order? ## I used to wish my name was different I used to wish my name was different. Easier to say. Even gave serious consideration to going through a formal name change down at the courthouse. But I didn't. I did not chicken out. I f*cking beat my stutter. ## I feel more comfortable when I bring up my own name I could tell you about my day. Like how I went to a 200 person fishing banquet last night. First time I was nervous? When I realized I would have to say my name at the front door. Luckily, there was only one lady working the table. I'm more nervous when there is a crowd. I feel more comfortable when I bring up my own name, versus when I'm asked my name. ## To see myself saying my name, Craig Coffee, fluidly What I practiced with this intentional dream was to see myself saying my name, Craig Coffee, fluidly, to physicians, to doctors. Why? Because that was part of my job. People who have authority. ## I used to feel intimidated by people with authority I used to feel very intimidated in front of people who had a lot, who had a tremendous amount of authority and power and wealth. So the thing about someone who has authority, it's like, it goes to how big you feel. When you talk to someone who has authority, you think of yourself as being tiny. I'm gonna guess, right? When you figure out how to beat your stutter, just like I did, when you figure out how to find your voice, your flow, your confidence, you're going to be able to own any room, just like this, just like me. ## I introduced myself, and I looked him right in his eyes, and I felt calm. I went from stuttering over my own name, cowering in class when I was called on to read aloud, to later in life introducing myself to a multi-billionaire, Shad Khan, owner of the NFL's Jacksonville Jaguars! You can too! I used to feel very intimidated in front of people who had a tremendous amount of authority and power and wealth. I was dressed up, I was at a ballroom event, and I saw him, I walked right up, I introduced myself, and I looked him right in his eyes, and I felt calm. That's how you know that you've beaten your stutter, when you can do this with extreme confidence. It's not about the money, but it's about the power of the person. The money is just to help us set the table, because in our society, what do people say? Money is power, right?