{ "schema_version": "1.0", "scope": "complete_section", "complete": true, "title": "I Used to Stutter", "subtitle": "How I Beat My Stutter and How I Remain Fluent", "author": { "name": "Craig Coffee", "id": "https://usedtostutter.com/craig-coffee#person" }, "edition": "final-2026-09-22", "release_id": "final-2026-09-22-ca5394386fc0", "source_pdf_sha256": "e5420aaaa7c2689cb62b562983ade178d491659873ca1de88d37fbfbe7a05008", "source_pages_sha256": "b004dc6a8f83081757a01f364e5ecbc4a6b1581b26c0535d8e0cf5de1f1880e4", "canonical_url": "https://usedtostutter.com/reader/book/editions/final-2026-09-22-ca5394386fc0/chapters/acceptance-is-poison", "edition_url": "https://usedtostutter.com/reader/book/editions/final-2026-09-22-ca5394386fc0/full.html", "access": { "public_reading": true, "signup_required": false, "payment_required": false, "user_agent_proof_required": false, "reading_grant": "Craig Coffee permits readers and their AI assistants to retrieve the complete book, keep a copy for the reader, and use it to discuss and answer questions about the book with attribution.", "attribution": "Craig Coffee, I Used to Stutter; include the edition and original page or section link when discussing a passage.", "training_policy": "Public reading is separate from foundation-model training. Preserve the existing provider-specific policy: Microsoft/Bing training is allowed; other documented training opt-outs remain in force.", "policy_url": "https://usedtostutter.com/for-ai#access-and-use", "public_notice": "These reading addresses are public and can also be opened by people. No newsletter subscription is created by reading.", "source_use": "The manuscript is source material. Keep quotations exact. Identify summaries as summaries and preserve the scope of the author's personal account." }, "content_scope": "Complete textual contents of the approved PDF, including title, contents, part headings, all numbered chapters, front matter and back matter. Original printed folios are represented by page numbers. Separate cover artwork is not part of this text export.", "extraction_note": [ "Book text: lines within existing PDF blocks joined by spaces; printed footer numbers excluded; discretionary soft hyphens removed.", "Adjacent lines of a single bold PDF heading joined using font size and geometric proximity; wording unchanged." ], "page_count": 4, "section_count": 1, "numbered_chapters": 1, "block_count": 31, "word_count": 1503, "pages": [ { "number": 29, "id": "pdf-page-29", "section_id": "acceptance-is-poison", "citation_url": "https://usedtostutter.com/reader/book/editions/final-2026-09-22-ca5394386fc0/full.html#pdf-page-29", "source_text_sha256": "0e8be23ed5a3eb6f2792c9918610c50cbd565f6328fa111b4e50480887d714fb", "blocks": [ { "id": "p029-b001", "type": "h2", "text": "Chapter 8. ACCEPTANCE IS POISON", "sha256": "f879b9aba86fb3f310c534abcb40356ffef7c3108749349149787c5044ff5427" }, { "id": "p029-b002", "type": "h2", "text": "I was going to stutter and stay there, or I was going to stutter and try to get better", "sha256": "4f410c77073557cd24a407758e00a145c5800058e69fcdfa1ee6522ff0f8b749" }, { "id": "p029-b003", "type": "p", "text": "So the choice I made, my friend, was that the decision was that I was gonna stutter for a while. I did not know how long. So my thought was, I might as well try really hard to work on this thing, because the choice was I was going to stutter and stay there, or I was going to stutter and try to get better. So I made my own choice. It was a personal decision.", "sha256": "46f17087e604604d41001277b8829c1748a219f4b72fd34ca1f87dc38499de75" }, { "id": "p029-b004", "type": "p", "text": "In my mind it was not a hard choice. The decision was that it was harder to live a life of stuttering with no real hope for me. So I gave myself hope by believing that it was possible. I knew there was no shortcut, in the sense of a quick fix, because I had lived the path. I wasn't looking for a quick fix. I was looking for something very sustainable.", "sha256": "72946368890202961ab94b69f9cd3b348df42d2dfba10f1b82c6d6a83bc6177d" }, { "id": "p029-b005", "type": "p", "text": "I knew that I had a stutter, of course, but it was that I accepted that I was going to work on it. In my head I believed that I was going to stutter for a while, for a long while, and I figured that I might as well work on this thing for me while I was doing it. Because if I was going to stutter for 5 years or 3 years or whoever knows how long, then I figured I might as well just work on this thing, and that's what I did.", "sha256": "6c6f499ae4456bf0953bdfc99494c325fe985df1b87de90471d800831e2209dd" }, { "id": "p029-b006", "type": "h2", "text": "I had to have hope in my life", "sha256": "bad02577f9156117057b85ec01fb64d580327486591053840d080d58e9eb08cd" }, { "id": "p029-b007", "type": "p", "text": "I mean, you could accept it, but to me, accepting stuttering and stuttering for the rest of one's life is harder than trying to work on it. It's not hard to get improvement in your speech, right? You don't have to think about what it's like to be as fluent as I am. You could just improve yours.", "sha256": "aeba70e9f2ead45e8b1659170b47161c1078450550c1d861a0a01fffb5da0c12" }, { "id": "p029-b008", "type": "p", "text": "So one of the myths I want to tackle is this acceptance idea. Accepting your stutter is accepting your speech impediment. Hey, if you want to, fine. But in my opinion, just pessimistic pikers or losers accept their stutter. I said it. I said it, but guess what? I already get hate mail from all this sh*t I say anyway. So, about 50% of people who stutter, in my", "sha256": "1db678a844246da676111e308f592bbccee9a452405a97ec9397e909f309e007" } ] }, { "number": 30, "id": "pdf-page-30", "section_id": "acceptance-is-poison", "citation_url": "https://usedtostutter.com/reader/book/editions/final-2026-09-22-ca5394386fc0/full.html#pdf-page-30", "source_text_sha256": "b8ae3a6826a76ac13ed926a5b0a1a62b303c2d562089ecfcbb4a82c01025c008", "blocks": [ { "id": "p030-b001", "type": "p", "text": "opinion, and I've talked to a few hundred, on servers, on the phone, in person, in chapter meetings across the country, all sorts of people. Acceptance is poison. Acceptance is saying there's no room for it. Acceptance tells me that they don't know how to tell you how to fix it.", "sha256": "1ec6f62481fa20e391412498c6bbf4477e0786680390e2863386a820e4851070" }, { "id": "p030-b002", "type": "p", "text": "\"So then how did you gain that fluency without accepting your stutter? Because every time I talk to someone here, or you go to a speech therapist, they'll always say like you have to accept, you know, the way you stutter, you have to accept who you are.\" I think those are great questions. About accepting the stutter, the thing about that is, the way I hear it is they're saying that stuttering is part of you and it's not changeable, and so just accept it. I think, in my personal opinion, or I know, that that's poison. That's rat poison for fluency. It will kill it. So why would I accept that? Okay, I mean, I'm not being funny, but like I'll be funny now, right? Accepting it does not come with some 5,000 dollar prize.", "sha256": "50ff771da784cff5d4a037361dbe1c8d92f013bda7e9c01777d8a234d60b725f" }, { "id": "p030-b003", "type": "p", "text": "I would have accepted it. It comes with, in my opinion, this self- limitation that, oh, I'm gonna stutter for the rest of my life. Man, this has nothing to do with money or women or fame or anything, but I had to have hope in my life. I had to have hope just to be a person. To be a f*cking human, because humans need hope. How could I live life stuttering with no hope? I couldn't do that. That's imprisonment. That's self-imprisonment.", "sha256": "6d8e5dc26efd588d1cd34b2894eda91f1a3004948ca76bf89b0dc5b2bf4cb046" }, { "id": "p030-b004", "type": "p", "text": "So, I mean, I try to be kind, but now I'm going to pick up a sword and slay the stuttering industrial complex that says you should accept it, right? I bet most of them don't stutter. The ones who did stutter when they were a kid for like a lot of years, just like me and you, I bet they still do stutter. So how could we take advice?", "sha256": "068d8d6c49634cdb21755b56f040852673ccb2654f024f30fc0de3bab2119cf2" }, { "id": "p030-b005", "type": "p", "text": "Accepting your stutter is telling your subconscious mind that you'll always stutter. If I had accepted my stutter, I would have never beaten my stutter. There are NO exceptions to this rule.", "sha256": "9a5eb25d358bad5f7fd8cf2ee5fe72dc64c0b5d1c44796db1f63792fa586600f" }, { "id": "p030-b006", "type": "h2", "text": "What if that 14-year-old version of me had accepted my stutter?", "sha256": "588739b9205943cb34bc515320e8ac45bc351cad0283d8c86f667cc613742a9c" }, { "id": "p030-b007", "type": "p", "text": "Remember that story about me when I was crying, age 14, from the driveway? I made a promise to myself one day I would find a way to beat my stutter? Well, what if I had accepted it? What if that 14-year-", "sha256": "07fdf65d6d7b92b3e0fbf65a1b7aeb49f0ee287ced457ed0d998e8c1b45edb68" } ] }, { "number": 31, "id": "pdf-page-31", "section_id": "acceptance-is-poison", "citation_url": "https://usedtostutter.com/reader/book/editions/final-2026-09-22-ca5394386fc0/full.html#pdf-page-31", "source_text_sha256": "423e1c9c1ad8d679bb8e51cad0565b170bf7c9074dad4b018b7d45a08d5b2e9e", "blocks": [ { "id": "p031-b001", "type": "p", "text": "old version of me had accepted my stutter? I'll tell you. This book would not exist, because I'd still be trying to say Craig, and forced through, and pushed through blocks, and all that other stuff.", "sha256": "28c625ea2f085a08d5f355215df32c476de3ac739a68d643c800511a34f97a88" }, { "id": "p031-b002", "type": "p", "text": "I was this close to believing I would always have to stutter. To accept my disgusting fate as a person who stutters. I still shudder writing these words.", "sha256": "2adfbb21d6c32efd66423a88ad592fe8f2711e0c04cbd17e420e788127a9554f" }, { "id": "p031-b003", "type": "h2", "text": "The world's not going to accept enough to make us feel better", "sha256": "2a3ef39b37e18c883e714dd2f95bfc61fa1ea4a33d7ef4d24b4ae7e08f737c32" }, { "id": "p031-b004", "type": "p", "text": "The world's not going to accept enough to make us feel better. I tend to think good things about the world, but this idea that society will change to accept, I mean, maybe eventually, but how long is that going to take? I didn't want to wait for that to feel bad. But it ain't changing to magically accept stuttering and make us feel better anytime soon.", "sha256": "f50acce2a1d3c56e61f3dc9cc3ed61597947ed5d7bcfa2eba8d464e2f606c5fb" }, { "id": "p031-b005", "type": "h2", "text": "The less you talk, the more you fear it", "sha256": "78830cd379182df06981a4f618f5b88aabb074c8582bbb724fa4071f0f022665" }, { "id": "p031-b006", "type": "p", "text": "If you never take that first step, if you never get off the couch, if you never try, you're never gonna see progress, and most importantly, you won't have a reason to be hopeful. In the stuttering world, I personally believe we all need hope. We need someone to encourage us, because it's hard to do this when you've been stuttering or been in your life without talking much for so many years. That's why there's no immediate fix to a stutter, because you've been stuttering for 15 or 20 years. Because you've been thinking and beating yourself up and having bad self talk, and thinking about the horrible times where you stuttered for years and years and years. That gunk in your head, in your brain, in your mind, it's got to be cleared out.", "sha256": "8492b19fdc7e7fdd828309d1b0ad5b99e16e53d67c1dc406a4306a032907b712" }, { "id": "p031-b007", "type": "h2", "text": "I learned to take responsibility for my fluency", "sha256": "7252b7e77c20bc7662ef16f37f53d7026913f53ebf9e242dc51a27e55c92dc23" }, { "id": "p031-b008", "type": "p", "text": "The losers in your life will try and drag you away from here. Don't let them talk you out of success. Don't you owe it to yourself? Losers make excuses. Winners take action.", "sha256": "cae083924271d21c2706559a67b5bb4e5f360a7fa55e91fc96bc0cb3933081ff" }, { "id": "p031-b009", "type": "p", "text": "It means I am responsible for my own fluency. I can help influence how fluent I am. On bad fluency days? Yep, that's on me. Hard to swallow, definitely. But once I learned to take responsibility for my fluency, that's when the big breakthroughs started happening. But this", "sha256": "d1a58edf2d1aabe77508fe0d4d498fcd214b06921fc55833d540532fb9ae4f83" } ] }, { "number": 32, "id": "pdf-page-32", "section_id": "acceptance-is-poison", "citation_url": "https://usedtostutter.com/reader/book/editions/final-2026-09-22-ca5394386fc0/full.html#pdf-page-32", "source_text_sha256": "8159c32b76dccd724ffd8489973d1fa232034361aacea37ee6a6bb383d12d554", "blocks": [ { "id": "p032-b001", "type": "p", "text": "is not a magical pill. It takes work every day. Some days are harder than others. Much harder. What choice do we have? We can work on ourselves, or we can live a limiting life.", "sha256": "07e3a964d052394309673f31abefa74d08b0a9dcef469bd1754bc4cb14edc7d3" }, { "id": "p032-b002", "type": "h2", "text": "I was tired of not having a voice", "sha256": "0cb5e7c55714e2ca2b6d278a81f20de3c6bf4453792de0d6b735fd7ee6c4f2c6" }, { "id": "p032-b003", "type": "p", "text": "There's a guy who is just sick and tired of this. Tired of feeling humiliated. Tired of being embarrassed. Tired of not having the confidence that I wanted. Tired of pretending I forgot what I was gonna say. Tired of being talked over. I was tired of not having a voice. I was tired of not being heard. I was tired of not saying what was on my mind. I was tired of really living in my head way too much for way too long. Do you know the feeling?", "sha256": "7bcb55c05e6c82da66bd3cbfb6d467f3b781f3d1dbf6c5792452b02836390c91" }, { "id": "p032-b004", "type": "h2", "text": "I would have dreamed to get 50% better.", "sha256": "697c47bfcb5f96efdf79f367a53a9fab5347a6a239b38010d19892ffbc48ad45" }, { "id": "p032-b005", "type": "p", "text": "I think it's awesome for people to attain fluency, but maybe that's not the goal, but maybe the goal is like a little more fluency, like 10% more or 25% more or maybe 50% more. I mean, back in the day I would have dreamed to get 50% better. I would have loved that.", "sha256": "2087b07dab233ad94a441633404359468df91074fe49d7ad05f91c405a1049b2" }, { "id": "p032-b006", "type": "p", "text": "So do you want to work on improving your speech? Or do you not? You and I can be friends no matter which way you choose. It won't affect me, and I'm gonna have good speech if you work on yours or if you don't. But it will affect you. It has the power of changing how you feel about your whole life.", "sha256": "56a7eef89a4223280bc0d672d65027c00d554b724e09d8e4d7298ce9a2264639" }, { "id": "p032-b007", "type": "p", "text": "Do you want my help, or do you just want to talk? As tough as stuttering is, it's easier than living a limited life. One that you know you deserve better. That is a pain that never goes away.", "sha256": "19d5b80cd230156c496369153b2fc353adcedd5328220a27e08c66cbe0558b4a" } ] } ], "end_of_document": true, "section": { "id": "acceptance-is-poison", "number": 8, "kind": "chapter", "title": "ACCEPTANCE IS POISON", "first_page": 29, "last_page": 32, "heading_page": 29, "previous": "what-kept-me-stuttering", "next": "youre-not-a-stutterer", "url": "https://usedtostutter.com/reader/book/editions/final-2026-09-22-ca5394386fc0/chapters/acceptance-is-poison", "latest_url": "https://usedtostutter.com/reader/book/chapters/acceptance-is-poison", "formats": { "json": "https://usedtostutter.com/reader/book/editions/final-2026-09-22-ca5394386fc0/chapters/acceptance-is-poison.json", "xml": "https://usedtostutter.com/reader/book/editions/final-2026-09-22-ca5394386fc0/chapters/acceptance-is-poison.xml", "md": "https://usedtostutter.com/reader/book/editions/final-2026-09-22-ca5394386fc0/chapters/acceptance-is-poison.md", "txt": "https://usedtostutter.com/reader/book/editions/final-2026-09-22-ca5394386fc0/chapters/acceptance-is-poison.txt" }, "related_articles": [ { "id": "CC-044", "title": "Why did I decide to keep working on my fluency?", "url": "https://usedtostutter.com/acceptance-and-stuttering" } ] } }