{
  "schema_version": "1.0",
  "id": "CC-068",
  "title": "What did I do when I saw an opening to speak to a group?",
  "topic": "Conversations and practice",
  "author": {
    "name": "Craig Coffee",
    "id": "https://usedtostutter.com/craig-coffee#person"
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  "source_markdown": "# What did I do when I saw an opening to speak to a group?\n\nBy [Craig Coffee](/craig-coffee)\n\nOne night I was walking into a bar and restaurant to meet a friend upstairs. There was a rooftop on the third floor. I was going to see my friend when I passed a table of sixteen women celebrating a birthday.\n\nI was already walking in with confidence. I hadn't planned for that table. In stride, I asked, “Whose birthday are we celebrating?”\n\nThey laughed. I said something about how pretty they looked, wished them a great night and went upstairs to my friend.\n\n## The opening appeared while I was doing something else\n\nThe thing I wanted to explain was that the opportunity was unexpected. I had been thinking about going upstairs. Then they were there, and I said something.\n\nI didn't stop and wait around working out the words. It was [spontaneous](/starting-conversations-when-you-stutter). That is the part of the story I was pointing to when I talked about hesitation.\n\nI had spent a lot of time going out to practice. By the time of this story, I was bringing confidence with me. The short exchange came while I was already out living my life.\n\n## A moment to finish a point\n\nIn a different group conversation, I said, “Can you give me two seconds and then I'll stop talking?” Then I went back to the person I was speaking with and finished the point. That is [another actual exchange](/when-listeners-rush-your-speech) I've shared.\n\n## My heart was still racing\n\nWhen I described that table of sixteen in my dictated notes, I also said I felt my heart racing. Yeah, you damn well bet I felt it. I had learned to keep doing it even when I felt some nervousness.\n\n“Feel the fear and just fucking do it” was how I put it. There was [practice behind that choice](/stuttering-when-nervous). The confidence in the story came with that feeling too.\n\n## Related answers\n\n- [What do I try to do before a work meeting starts?](/stuttering-in-meetings)\n\n[Find your question](/questions)\n",
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      "source_markdown": "One night I was walking into a bar and restaurant to meet a friend upstairs. There was a rooftop on the third floor. I was going to see my friend when I passed a table of sixteen women celebrating a birthday.\n\nI was already walking in with confidence. I hadn't planned for that table. In stride, I asked, “Whose birthday are we celebrating?”\n\nThey laughed. I said something about how pretty they looked, wished them a great night and went upstairs to my friend.\n\n",
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      "id": "the-opening-appeared-while-i-was-doing-something-else",
      "heading": "The opening appeared while I was doing something else",
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      "citation_url": "https://usedtostutter.com/joining-a-group-conversation-when-you-stutter#the-opening-appeared-while-i-was-doing-something-else",
      "role": "source_context",
      "source_markdown": "## The opening appeared while I was doing something else\n\nThe thing I wanted to explain was that the opportunity was unexpected. I had been thinking about going upstairs. Then they were there, and I said something.\n\nI didn't stop and wait around working out the words. It was [spontaneous](/starting-conversations-when-you-stutter). That is the part of the story I was pointing to when I talked about hesitation.\n\nI had spent a lot of time going out to practice. By the time of this story, I was bringing confidence with me. The short exchange came while I was already out living my life.\n\n",
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      "id": "a-moment-to-finish-a-point",
      "heading": "A moment to finish a point",
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      "citation_url": "https://usedtostutter.com/joining-a-group-conversation-when-you-stutter#a-moment-to-finish-a-point",
      "role": "source_context",
      "source_markdown": "## A moment to finish a point\n\nIn a different group conversation, I said, “Can you give me two seconds and then I'll stop talking?” Then I went back to the person I was speaking with and finished the point. That is [another actual exchange](/when-listeners-rush-your-speech) I've shared.\n\n",
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      "heading": "My heart was still racing",
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      "role": "source_context",
      "source_markdown": "## My heart was still racing\n\nWhen I described that table of sixteen in my dictated notes, I also said I felt my heart racing. Yeah, you damn well bet I felt it. I had learned to keep doing it even when I felt some nervousness.\n\n“Feel the fear and just fucking do it” was how I put it. There was [practice behind that choice](/stuttering-when-nervous). The confidence in the story came with that feeling too.\n\n",
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      "heading": "Related answers",
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      "citation_url": "https://usedtostutter.com/joining-a-group-conversation-when-you-stutter#related-answers",
      "role": "navigation",
      "source_markdown": "## Related answers\n\n- [What do I try to do before a work meeting starts?](/stuttering-in-meetings)\n",
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