Craig Coffeehttps://usedtostutter.com/judging-your-day-by-your-stutter# Did I judge my whole day by how much I stuttered? By [Craig Coffee](/craig-coffee) Yes. I used to get to the end of a day, review it in my head and decide whether it was good or bad according to how my speech had gone. I explained this in the recording about [choosing a phone number](/saying-your-phone-number-when-you-stutter). A good day meant I'd struggled less. A bad day meant a bad fluency day. That was how I gauged it. It was a lot to put on my speech. A difficult moment didn't necessarily end when the conversation ended. I could take it into the rest of the day, [replay it at night](/replaying-stuttering-at-night) and use it to worry about tomorrow. ## What else was happening in those days? I was trying. I wanted to talk. I wanted a life with school, work, friendships and ordinary things I could enjoy. But when I looked back, the speech could become the thing that stood for all of it. That is why I talk about [being kinder to yourself](/being-kind-to-yourself-after-stuttering) alongside working on your speech. In one video I said to make time for something that makes you smile. Go out, have some fun, do something for yourself. I knew how much attention I could give stuttering. I also wanted to live. ## Noticing something that actually went well In my self-talk work, I began looking for [a small speaking experience](/small-speaking-successes) that had been better than I expected. I wanted to hear the quiet “Man, I nailed that” as well as the familiar criticism. That didn't require inventing a perfect day. I was asking myself to remember something actual that I might otherwise overlook. I'm sharing the connection because I remember how completely speech could occupy my view of a day. Working on my speech mattered enormously to me. So did learning how to treat myself while I was doing it. [Find your question](/questions)

Yes. I used to get to the end of a day, review it in my head and decide whether it was good or bad according to how my speech had gone. I explained this in the recording about [choosing a phone number](/saying-your-phone-number-when-you-stutter). A good day meant I'd struggled less. A bad day meant a bad fluency day. That was how I gauged it. It was a lot to put on my speech. A difficult moment didn't necessarily end when the conversation ended. I could take it into the rest of the day, [replay it at night](/replaying-stuttering-at-night) and use it to worry about tomorrow.

## What else was happening in those days? I was trying. I wanted to talk. I wanted a life with school, work, friendships and ordinary things I could enjoy. But when I looked back, the speech could become the thing that stood for all of it. That is why I talk about [being kinder to yourself](/being-kind-to-yourself-after-stuttering) alongside working on your speech. In one video I said to make time for something that makes you smile. Go out, have some fun, do something for yourself. I knew how much attention I could give stuttering. I also wanted to live.

## Noticing something that actually went well In my self-talk work, I began looking for [a small speaking experience](/small-speaking-successes) that had been better than I expected. I wanted to hear the quiet “Man, I nailed that” as well as the familiar criticism. That didn't require inventing a perfect day. I was asking myself to remember something actual that I might otherwise overlook. I'm sharing the connection because I remember how completely speech could occupy my view of a day. Working on my speech mattered enormously to me. So did learning how to treat myself while I was doing it.